This spring has been especially difficult for me. With all of the hope and promise popping up I can’t help but feel pulled down with loneliness, boredom and lack of motivation.
Even my living space reflects my feelings. Messy, stuffy, confusing. This is not natural. Humans were not created to be bumps on a log. (There are actual bumps on logs and I have yet to discover their use.)
Humans were created to glorify God and pursue their passions in life and do what they are good at and do all of the other things that bumper stickers and coffee cups inspire us to do. But, in a broken, sinful world we find it easier to sit down after the first minor set back and throw up our hands in dismay.
I have been going through A Gospel Primer by Milton Vincent for the past several months. Reading and re reading it as I prepare my heart for the day; its hard sometimes. Daily we are called to die to our selves, die to our wants, our wills, and our comforts as we daily pick up our crosses and follow Jesus. And, more often than not I fail.
But we are all given grace. Every day is new and spring came to me this year like a slap in the face. I don’t know if I was waiting for the perfect time to start divesting myself of bad habits or if I was just content to let it pass me by. But either way I realized life is not a merry-go-round. It’s a runaway train; only gaining speed the further along it gets. There will never be a prefect time to get on. we just have to hitch up our pants and get a running start.
With that mindset, and a lot of prayer and faith, I’m beginning to feel motivated. I’m receiving encouragement from people I didn’t even know were capable of encouraging me, and while I still have no sense of direction, I have a sense of peace for where I’m at.
It is my hope and prayer that this snapshot of my struggles will be an encouragement and/or challenge you as you continue to grow in life and in faith.
Don’t forget to pause, smell the flowers, soak in the miracle of sunshine, and drink in the blessing of the rain. Welcome back, Spring!